By Stephanie D. Lewis
Disney studios has been stealing snippets and scenarios from my own personal life to make scores of hit movies! I’m thinking there’ll be many lawsuits with the evidence and Exhibit A’s I’m listing as follows:
SLEEPING BEAUTY: It’s shocking how much Disney plagiarized my childhood events for this animated feature—Where do I even begin? First of all, just like Maleficent, I was not invited to a certain baby christening. My own! Although my parents sited Judaism as the reason they weren’t having one. Also identical to Aurora, I was born as royalty (according to my father)—his Jewish American Princess. Then in middle school, while sewing my own gym bag in Home EC class, I pricked my finger on the spindle of a spinning wheel. Okay, okay, I just poked myself with a sharp needle but still, from that day forward, my mother could never awaken me from my deep slumber to get to school on time.
CINDERELLA: There can be no doubt of blatant copycatting here. But how Walt managed to spy on me in shoe stores, I’ll never know! Obviously, it was my shoving, jamming and forcing my pregnant, swollen feet inside that last pair of sparkly stilettos in a Size 6 narrow, (Nordstrom’s half-yearly sale!) that sparked his inspiration for the wicked stepsister’s dramatic scene where she cuts off her heel. Perhaps I’ve never cleaned ashes from our fireplace but make no mistake, I’ve definitely thought of turning mice into coachmen because I have a severe rodent phobia. Original Smoriginal!
WRECK-IT RALPH: Disney obviously tapped into my phoneline to get this clever title. You see, Ralph is the name of my Farmer’s auto insurance rep. Three times during the year before this movie was made, I had to sheepishly call and report a claim with my Mazda—lowering my voice to a shameful whisper the third time, I confessed, “I Wrecked it, Ralph.”
FINDING NEMO: I might be persuaded to drop these allegations since it’s a bit of a leap. However, I think I have a valid claim of plagiary here. Whenever I get a new cellphone and want to make a grocery list, I can never locate that little yellow “Notepad” icon. All around the house, I can be heard shouting, “Somebody! I need help FINDING MEMO!” Aha! I rest my case!
PARENT TRAP: Alright, nobody can poke holes in this airtight accusation. I have identical twin boys. (See where I’m going with this?) One day, my one scaredy-cat son talked his twin brother into taking his place at the pediatricians for a flu shot. When their dad and I discovered this sneaky switcheroo, we didn’t have a romantic reunion and reconcile our marriage, but we did get them radically different haircuts. Shame on you Disney, give credit where credit’s due!
101 DALMATIANS: One year I challenged myself to do a whole bunch of mitzvahs so I decided to make 100 Donations to Jewish Family Services. If Disney thinks they can get away with adding a 1 and changing my philanthropy quest to some random white dog with black spots on it, they’ve got another thing coming!
WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT?: At a fundraiser auction at my old synagogue, I was in charge of readying the portrait of Roger (our newest handsome clergy) for people to bid on. I guess I should’ve had his photo professionally mounted and matted at Aaron Brothers because everyone kept asking, “Who Framed Rabbi Roger?” Sheesh! The similarities are uncanny, Walt!
HONEY, I SHRUNK THE KIDS: I’m hereby accusing Disney of eavesdropping in my laundry room the day I haphazardly tossed my daughter’s white tennis shoes into the washer and dryer. Pulling them out, they looked two sizes smaller, so I shouted, “Honey, I shrunk the Keds!”
JAMES AND THE GIANT PEACH: This movie title was directly lifted from my Uncle James who presides over our Passover seders. We always bring extra chairs because the guests overflow. We refer to it as James and the Giant Pesach. Shame on Disney studios. I’ll see you in court!